“ANYTHING DEAD COMING BACK TO LIFE HURTS.”
men have come and go,
performing seances to raise the dead inside of you but the spirits are stubborn you see. they’re spiteful, running amok under your skin, hiding under every organ you had ever used to love. most nights, you lie awake, naked stomach up in the air to hear them /curse/ you.
they remind you
that you’re haunted all the way through.
these ghosts are lonely and lost too.
some nights they’re quiet, so you sit by the window and howl upon the full moon, hoping they’ll return. worried that they might have found love elsewhere, a home in a woman with a warmer soul. a home in a woman who’ll bring them back to life. they come back to you in the end, because home is where they’ve come from; the hot grief bubbling in your belly.
sometimes when you shut your eyes, the spirits grow hands and feet and hearts, bloody and gold like the burning sun. sometimes when you close your eyes,
the spirits become one.
and she calls you Mum.
by Abida Uddin
This poem was inspired by Toni Morrison’s Beloved. Even the title is a direct quote from the book. It explores the themes of grief and motherhood through supernatural imagery.
Abida is a second year Media and English student. Her interests include poetry and anything true crime-related. Swears that Luther is the best TV show on the planet. She is an aspiring screenwriter and a general film enthusiast. Lady Bird is a film she never stops thinking about.